13. I Can Explain Everything

I can explain everything. I can eat an entire raw cow in one sitting. I can stretch my fingers into a rudimentary sling with which to cradle the next incarnation of Christ. My teeth will turn into birds and fly to freedom of a morning.

I’m married to Serendipity, but I’m fucking Pretense on the side.

I eat black coffee three meals a day. When I play games, I win. When I teach bricks to fly, the sky is thick with masonry.

I walk in borrowed shoes. I keep my debt at the red line at all times; it’s the only way I have to define my boundless success.

I am hardly ever ashamed or afraid. When it does happen, that’s how I know it’s time to get puking drunk. In the morning, I wake up screaming from a dream I can’t remember.

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