Yeah, this isn’t gonna be like that. I hope that’s okay.
Why don’t you just go fail me.
Are you kidding me? This is the highlight of my year.
Do you wish to be verbally abused?
Picture not being able to.
Especially since I don’t even remember.
You remember this omelet with some fondness.
You told me to do that.
The shit you care about doesn’t matter.
I’m just fucking getting into it, man. Where’s the harm in that?
I like the taste because I know what it means.
Shall we acknowledge the weirdness of this situation?
I’m sorry I killed you.
Nothing you say will convince me to stop cleaning my ears.
Okay, yeah, what’s the real reason?
My internal monologue is more sophisticated than my external communication.
No, you’re going to sit here and watch me be angry.
Why am I talking? I’m going to stop.
I know what that means, and I wish it for you.
Yeah, show me what a big tough man you are.
I’m trying to make it easy on you, man.
I ate them. They were good.
Everything I did, I did because I was fucking crazy.
I will tell you. I just have to get ready for it.
Alright, you got me. I’ll stop repeating myself.
In all these issues, the solution ends up being an ale tankard full of tuna salad.
I am so, so sorry. I have a problem.
My contempt for you is galactic in scope.
I wasn’t contesting your portioning. I was confirming the amount.
I’m gonna be perfectly honest with you: I fucking love it.
Before we go any further, I should tell you: I can’t understand a word you’re saying.
Hold on, I didn’t realize that that was a factor. That changes everything. Will you come back over here, and we can talk about it?
Show me out. I have nothing to offer you.
Ethan Abides 