Blam Hammer
Item
This is a hammer, a mallet, really, with cartoonish dimensions and proportions. In use, it is no more heavy and unwieldy than a gavel. You use it to smash things. The sound it makes is, “Blam!” Whatever it hits is destroyed utterly, smashed into tiny pieces. Unless that something is alive, in which case it deals damage like a “normal” big-ass mallet. This will probably still kill whatever it is, but it won’t be destroyed utterly, smashed into tiny pieces.
The Blam Hammer will never accidentally destroy something you don’t want destroyed. So if you’re aiming for the priceless figurine and accidentally hit your phone instead, it’ll be okay. Well, I mean, it won’t be destroyed utterly, smashed into tiny pieces. The hammer might still damage whatever it hits. In the case of your phone, damage seems likely. But the Blam Hammer will only blam something if you want it to.
Ethan Abides 